Instructions:
based off my teachers comments on my work: ” To strengthen your work, you should incorporate more specific historical evidence. While you reference important events like the Afghan invasion of 1722 and concepts like the millet system, adding more detailed examples (such as specific policies, leaders, or regional impacts) would make your argument more persuasive.
You should also improve clarity and organization. Some sentences are very long and combine multiple ideas, which makes your argument harder to follow. Breaking these into clearer, more concise sentences will improve readability.
Additionally, deepen your analysis by explaining how these changes affected different groups of people, such as peasants, merchants, artisans, or religious communities, rather than speaking broadly about people.
Work on strengthening your comparative structure by directly linking the Safavid and Ottoman experiences within paragraphs rather than discussing them mostly separately.
Finally, refine your academic tone by avoiding repetition and making your conclusions more precise. Overall, your essay is well-developed and on the right track; adding specificity, improving clarity, and deepening analysis will elevate it further.” Fix my assignment based off my work that I have uploaded below. ALSO the changes you make on my work put the words in a DIFFERENT text color so I know what the changes are that were made.
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